This is US. For CNY.

Yes Yes, Yes! I know.. CNY( in case some of you didn't know what CNY is, its the short form of Chinese New Year ) is here again! Fast right? Im pretty sure all those kids are happy again.. I wonder why are they soooo happy? I am once one of those kids, and yea, I am very happy whenever it comes to CNY..
But now, by looking back at the 19 CNY that I had been through.. I wonder, why am I soooooOOOOOOO happy when it is CNY. I mean, what is the MAIN POINT on being so hyper and happy?

Is it because of the AngPao?( in case some of you didn't know what an AngPao is, It is actually a red packet with money inside, which is given to the kids when they are paying visit to someone's place)
As you can see, they are KIDS! Whenever they get AngPao.. What would they do? Or should I say, what would their parents do?
"Boy~Give me the red packet, Mummy will help you on keeping them! Here, Good boy!"
And after handing the red packets to their parents, they went and "party" with their cousins or friends or whoever.
So, Red packet doesn't really seems attractive enough for kids huh..?

Or is it because of they get the chances to see all their relatives once again? ( Strongly do not think this is the point that they get so happy about)
Well, honestly.. You will only be happy when you get to see your uncles/aunts/cousins who happened to be really close to you right? And what about those who were kind of "lost contacting" with you?
"Heck care them.." I believe some of you would think that way. ADMIT IT!
Alright.. Even me myself will say that sometimes.

Or is it because they get the chance to buy HELL LOTS of new clothes? ( Imma talk about this )
You know, this is the HOT TOPIC now for teenagers. Er.. Am I wrong? not only teenagers I guess.. some aunties/uncles would ask the same question as well..
"Hey, you bought your new year's clothes yet?"
If you ask me.. NO is my answer.

My point is.. I believe every and each of you out there, buy clothes/shoes. Like maybe once in a month, after you get your pay for your hard work. Or you buy yourself a new dress or something for a dinner or whatever. Even for the children, their parents will buy them clothes when they feels like it.
Since we all are buying clothes/shoes so often already, then why should we spend like more than a thousand on clothes again on CNY?
I know some of you would say.. "BECAUSE ITS CNY, ONE YEAR ONE TIME MA!"
Yea I know, its CNY, don't you think of using the money that you spent on your clothes else where? Like what you may ask..
Like bringing your whole family to a good restaurant and dine TOGETHER!

Some of the peoples even needs 7 sets of clothes for CNY. One set for a day. So you looks new for 7 days. Geez! Is it necessary?
Im not saying that.. YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO BUY CLOTHES FOR CNY, But one or 2 sets is enough don't you think?
Guess I'll show you guys some photos of me and my clothes for CNY! And also my brother's.

Nope, those ain't new. Bought the trousers few years ago. And the shirt? Bought it last year in Singapore.
And heres another view of my brother and his clothes.

As of for shoes? A Converse will do I guess? From the de-colouring and the dirtied part, you can roughly guess how old the converse is already!
Many ask, why do I put my trousers into my shoes..
"This is ME! My way of wearing my Converse-high."

Off Topic : And I find it funny when some peoples tend to get themselves short pants for CNY, their friends will be like.. "Huh? Your wearing short pants to people's house? That's weird."
Er.. Mind telling me whats so weird bout that please? And they say it's gay for guy to wear short pants that is shorter to their knee level. I was like.. What?!

And if that makes me gay? And it makes you failed for having such a weird views on short pants.
Well, now, I'll say that, the shirt was new. As my friend bought it for me from Taiwan. He came back recently. So yea, the shirt is pretty new though. And also for the white flops, I bought it recently. As my previous flops was totally "crushed".
The cool glasses? I borrow it from my friend.

I found some very old shirt which I bought last year. And I wore it for only one time! geeZ, How waste! When I just bought it, I thought it looks nice, but then I realized that, I can't really wear this out everyday.. And the shirt itself looks like it should be worn for some occasions.
But! I think I can wear the cloth again? For CNY. ( See, Im saving money again! )
But, the shirt is a little bit tight for my size now.. Hah!

With the FLOPS?
Yea.. Whats with it.. I don't find it weird. LOOKS FAB to me.
And.. And! The jean was also worn once. Bought it last year as well. Guess this would be my new cloth for CNY? ( 0 budget )
Although I don't really like the whole thing. LOL! Im not really into shirts like that.. Wonder why did I bought it..
Im more into normal Tee.. Simple and easy.. Hehe! And it's easier to find a pant/trousers to match with it..
And lastly, I'll just show the Tee, which me and my brother love it MOST! Which our mummy bought it for us when she went to Kuching for a short trip, last year.

And again! I am not saying that you all are not allowed to buy yourself clothes for CNY. Yes you do, it's your money after all, but don't you think spending so much on clothes on one go is kind of.. too over? Think about it..
My friend's brother's told me that.. he has a friend who spent RM700 plus for 5 tee shirt, for his CNY. I was like.. What the..?! Rich kid I suppose?

And thats all from me! Signing off with 4 pictures. APPLE TEES!

Dirty Little Secrets~

I believe that everyone of you have your very own Dirty Secrets which you would never want anyone to know about them =X
Guess I am so right about that..

So, how do you keep your secrets? By hiding them in your heart? Well, I think most of the people out there, would still love to share their secret with someone.. Although it is a secret.
It's good if you are sharing your secrets with someone who are trust worthy, and will not leak your personal stuff out. What if you found the wrong person to share with? That's just too bad! There is lots of peoples out there who happened to love on spreading rumors nowadays.. Guess your little secret will be known by the whole world within a minute if you shared your Dirty Little Secret with someone with a CNN mouth, World Wide Broadcasting.

Okay, Here is what I would do if I really really really wanna share something that is sooo secretive! There is always 2 options for me.

First - Share it with someone that I really know him/she well, and trusted him/her.
As some of you that know me well enough, should know that I don't really share everything of me with ANYONE. I only share it with someone that is close with me.. Close enough for me to trust them.
And honestly, I am so so so glad to have such friends around me.
And yea, they sure knew lots of my untold story. =P They should also considered themselves as lucky cause I chose them to be the one to share my story?

Second - Write it down in a book/diary. (Imma talk more about this, I am even going to show you guys my "Secret Book")
Can't find yourself someone who is trust worthy to share your little secrets? Why not just buy yourself a small little book and write everything down in the book? And keep it somewhere only you know, so no one else can find it but you. Safe enough to keep your secret right? And it is also a very good way to tell every single details of your "Dark Story" =X

Alright.. few days back, I was trying to tidy up my room. And I found a sling bag of mine. I unzipped it and found 2 books inside.. And WooHoo! I found my "Secret Book".

My "BOOKS" looks so MADLY COOL!

Imma show you guys the smaller one first! It work as my diary when I first bought it. But then I realized Im getting so lazy on writing it every night.. So why not I just change it into some useful "STORE" where I store my story and my secrets, which I don't think I would ever tell anyone.

What a beauty!
Yes, Its a guest book. But who care? Its mine now, I want it to be my diary, so it needs to obey :)
And look at the pens besides! The 2 pens that I bought are not in blue nor black ink. Instead, they are in WHITE and GREY ink. Cause the pages in my DIARY/BOOK of Secrets are all in black! ( How clever and creative am I to get such an unique diary? )
Black pages with white/grey ink on it.. Just purely FAB!

And I used to carry it everywhere when I was still in Singapore.
Who am I going to meet, What am I doing, Where am I.. were all written in it.
It helps on recalling my memories I had in Singapore! Just Sweet! Miss all those days I had in Singapore!

Sneak peek of the inside of it! I know you wants more! So that you can read on it! LOL!

Get to read anything from the picture above? Craving for more right? I know you all are so curious on whats inside! Hah! Love the white on black pages! And wow at my handwriting.. Its kind of messy..

And this is when it is still working as My Diary! So nothing much to hide =P

Alright, That's all for the small book. As for the bigger one.. I haven't used much of it. It is still pretty new and FRESH. lol
Theres few pages been used though.. And I rip them off and threw them off. As It was just something useless that I wrote before.
And heres a clear view of it..

This is different than the small one. As all the pages inside are white, and as you all can see, it is alot more bigger than the small one, so you can write more stuff of yours in it :)
This is a gift from my friend. He lost on betting something with me, and so I took him to the place where I bought my previous book to get this one. Haha! Clever me of choosing gift!

Didn't took much pictures of this one.. Cause its mostly blank.
One last picture for this book.

Wow! Someone's name is pretty obvious here! And yea! That's my handwriting! Nice? Messy.
Blue ink on white page still looks pretty nice though. Black on white looks too common and normal. Shoulda try red on white next time when I have something to write in the book.. Should looks nice too right..?

And here is my last picture of my 2 little Secrets Books! The Duo!

End of the pics! Feeling like trying what I've done to my secrets? Try it :) It'll be really interesting when your reading all you've wrote it now in your future. You could really laugh your ass off by then.

Psst! If your interested on sharing your Secret/Story with me, Feel free to email them to me. I'll put them into my Books.

Wondering where I get those books in Singapore? They are from Prints. They have lots of FAB notebooks! Go have a look there! And you might find yourself something!


Later!

My Privacy.

DingDong! A friendly reminder here.. Be prepared for a long entry. Get yourself some snacks before laying your eyes on the very first word after this line. DingDong!


What comes in your mind when we speak of privacy? Is it necessary for us to show respects onto people's privacy? If we don't have to.. Then what IS privacy?

Look, I am not here to attack anyone.. (Including MY OWN MUM! So kindly don't lecture me after reading my entry, Thank You. I am just pointing out my views! When and where and how should I and anyone else's privacy should be respected by not only their parents, but everyone!)


Firstly~ Door/Room matters.
Alright, I know nowadays, A LOT parents doesn't allow their children to lock their bedroom's door up! BUT I think, this should be apply for children who are below 18 year old!
And I know parents are just trying to protect their children from doing silly things at the other side of the locked door..

If the children live in a happy family, with a lovely dad and a caring mum, I believe they will never try to cut themselves with knife and trying to be emo in their own room every night, or try to kill themselves in their own room.

And heres the point..
If they woried about their children so much, why don't they just let them to sleep right BETWEEN them? And not at the next room?

What? You need privacy? So you parents can DO SOMETHING WHICH KIDS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO SEE? Hmm.. Pretty interesting eh?

Alright, and here I am to talk about MY PRIVACY.
I am turning 20 on this coming March. And I sleep alone with my own room. And I do lock my door up whenever I sleep. (Why do you lock your door when you sleep? You may ask.. What if a thief broke into your house one night huh? Well, at least I am still safe, and it saves me more time to call for help or whatever that your gonna do. Good enough to answer your question? No? Then don't lock your door when your making love with your loved one)

And here is a BIG RESPECT for my brother Wilson. He knock whenever he tries to enter my room, and not by dashing into my room. He enter without knocking only when Im in the room, and with the door widely opened. And whenever he tries to wake me up from my dream, he knocked softly and not banging on the door. How sweet he is :)

And now.. My mum. *Roll Eyes*
For your info, the keys to unlock my bedroom's door is hung on the key hanger on the wall, left hand sided to my bedroom's door. But, for strangers, to get the correct keys into my room.. their chances are like 10/20.. Because~ The keys there.. are like a bunch of grapes! Wanna get into my room? Worth trying it :) But for us( me, my mum and my bro ) we know which keys unlock which door.

So! My mum, unlock and enter my room without any knocking sometimes in the morning. Which I find it pretty.... rude and annoying.
I know many of you would say that.. " She is your mum, and that's her house, of course she can enter your room without asking for your permission!"
Yea right.. Okay.. Let's put it this way.. WHAT IF!

I am masturbating in my room, and my mum dash into my room.. and I cum..?

I am having some wild fun sex with my sex partner or whoever, and my mum entered?

I am fully naked and having phone sex with someone?

So you see..? There are many things that I definitely do not want my mum to see!
And whenever I try to tell her to knock before coming into my room.. she would just say..

" I am your mum! Is there anything I cannot see!?"

And I'll be like.. *ROLLLLLL EYES*
There is nothing that you cannot see when I was still little, But when I am 20, there is ALOT OF THINGS THAT YOU SHOULDN'T SEE! Like what you would ask.. MY DICK LA!
You all would most probably says that my mum had seen my dick when I was little.. But DUH! You think 20yo's dick looks like a 5yo's dick? Search up for porn on the internet and make comparison to some baby around you! GEEZ!

Alright! Not going to rant anymore craps about this! I think that's enough for you all to think!

Secondly~! My Letters!
And here I AM to talk about MY PRIVACY of my letters.

Whenever I received any letters via mail box. My mum would be eager to read the content. And No.. She didn't ask it from me.. She took it and read.. And no..I don't let her to read it, I'll snatch it back and say..

"Hey! This is MY LETTERS!"
"So..?" My mum would say.
"So..?! You should ask the permission from me before you can read the contents! It's my letter after all! You have to respect my privacy you know!"
"Im your mum! Is there anything that I can't see? Let me see!"

Yay! And she won by saying that! I know that YOU are my MUM! And you have all the rights to know what I am doing.. But will you at least let me have some privacy of my own please?

I believe my mum wasn't really mean it to took my letter away and read it and knowing the contents. I believe that she was just trying to get the answer about WHO had sent me letter. Since I don't receive letter often.
It could be anyone :) AhLong( underground bank, if some of you happened on not knowing what AhLong is ) perhaps? To threaten me maybe? Well, But she is pretty sure that I don't get money from AhLong.

Guess I'll just end this MAD LONG entry here..? In case some of you get really bored of this, and get really pissed about me complaining about my mum. Who care..? Me?

And as for conclusion. Should others respect others privacy? Of course they SHOULD! If we don't have to.. Then why are there roomS in our house? And not only one room?
Yea! Its to give others spaces of their own. And yea, everyone has their rights to do anything they want without letting anyone knowing it..

Well anyway..

Thanks for showing your concern MUM.. Love you as always :)

Guess that's all from me! Cheers!

UPDATES : I'LL HIGHLIGHT THIS! CAUSE MY MUM AND I JUST QUARRELED OVER THE LETTER AND MY UNFINISHED BLOG ENTRY! I DON'T LIKE PEOPLE TO PEEP ON WHAT IM TYPING/WRITTING WHEN IT'S NOT DONE! NOT ONLY MY MUM.. BUT EVERYONE!

Pissed by thinking about the past..

You know I was pretty pissed these few days when I think about MY PAST.. lAlAlA!

And so.. I decided to blog it all out..

Firstly, I would just LOVE to talk about something which had nearly crushed me. Remember my entry "Something for you to Think.." ? ( Something which I think I posted last month )

I was just wondering why am I so damn stupid on falling into someone that is so damn NERD! (NO, I am not attacking him/her/it or whatever that someone or something is, You would know the anger when you are at my situation)

Okay, and here is something interesting for you all :)

"I can't get rid of him! I tried to, but he kept on STICKING on me!" Yeaa! I heard this from my friend.
This is SO UNCOOL! Saying something which is totally not true about me? What a "GENTLEMAN" huh..?

Let me just make this clear.. I DID NOT STICK myself to YOU! Yea, I did asked you out for dinner.. Big deal? I can't asked you out for dinner as a friend? Woo! So who is the one that is over thinking/reacting now?
Well, that's fine. At least..! We know who is the one that overly reacted.

And heres the second shitty yet initeresting news!

"I wanted him to go home and sleep at his own place, but he didn't want to.. And we ended up sleeping at my place" Thanks to another of my friend for this message.

Woo..Hold on there.. I would just head back to my own place if I WAS the one who was driving! Sadly to tell, the SOMEONE was driving most of the times!
Alright, time to clear this shit out again.. Hello? Did I ever said..

"Hey, I want to sleep at your place tonight" No I didn't.

"Hey, can we sleep together tonight at your place?" No I didn't!

And please! You can just send me home when your driving! But why the hell did you took the route to your place instead of mine? And now who is the one who wanted who to sleep at whose place? Geex!
And guess what.. My friend told me more ..

"You can just send him home straight? You can say no to him.. DUH?" My friend said.

"Hmm.. Its good to have someone to hug when sleeping some times.. hahaha!" Said by the SOMEONE.

Ha-Ha-Ha! Very funny! And now ? Am I the one who wanted to sleep at YOUR place? Or you are the one who wanted me to sleep at your place.. YOU FAILED! BIG ONE!

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Well, you see, I just felt pretty unfair and pissed whenever I think of these! If my friend didn't had told me about that, I wouldn't had known that the someone said something like that about me at my back! Which totally SUCK BALLS!

I am not mean! I just don't like people to tell something which is TOTALLY UNTRUE about me.. and said it like they have all the right to say so.. And I had totally no rights to say anything to fight back.

When my friend told me about what the SOMEONE says about me, My jaws droped from my mouth's level to the core level of the earth. And the feeling sucks! The someone makes me sounded like some kind of slut who kept on sticking themselves to some sugar daddy or shit to get benefits from them. FUCK!

And after I posted the entry about the SOMEONE and me, lots of my friends thought that Im having depression. But seriously I AM NOT! Please :) You all don't have to worry about me that much.. I am GOOOOOODDDD.. PERFECTLY GOOOODDD!

Got to say that, I was pretty down when we broke up, but I healed myself in an amazing speed. Hehe!

So HuiWennnn! I am really good now! Thanks for caring message when we were mapling that day! Haha! Cute :)

And also Jackie, thank you too for your lovely support on Facebook!

And not forgetting Yuewen as well! Lovely Tweets on Twitter!

MADLY LOVING you all GIRLS!

And NO! I am not undergoing depression/emo or whatever that makes people have the thoughts on killing themselves.

And lastly! Before I end my craps, I'll leave my gmail here :) Been using it for sometimes now.. So was just wondering why not leaving my mailling address here.. And that is MY GMAIL.. NOT MSN. My msn maillig address is crrently been spammed with tons of emails. And that's why I chose to leave my gmail here and not my msn's.

Keep reading to know what's happening around HERE! Get the gossip fresh and HOT here! LOL

This is SOO! CRAPS! But Sweet!

I felt so freaking pissed these few days! As I was been told to stop thinking on going back to Singapore for my study! I felt so damn hopeless for that! Instead, I was been told to start working! And I was like...

WHAT THE FUCK?! With what?! Every company requires a PAPER! (Pretty sure you all knew what Im referring to)

And I was really very very very very very very upset and mad and pissed! I thought that I was always been supported by my family on whatever Im going to do. But I was wrong on that..
Besides that, one of my cousin had been really.. ARGH! Im not sure whether is it right to describe my cousin this way.. But he has been IGNORANT! oOps?

AND NO! HE IS NOT 20 YEAR OLD OR 25! HE IS GETTING SO FREAKING CLOSE TO 40!

But I was so lucky that my mum and my brother was always on my side! (And yea, My dad is the one who asked me to stop thinking on studying in Singapore)

My mum tried to fight for me (when I said fight, I don't mean the war thing like you see in Lord of the Ring alright.. It's to help me to persuade my dad on letting me oversea for my study) but she failed.

BUT! I didn't give up! :) Knowing that going over to Singapore is impossible, I then turned my target on studying to a very local Uni. And I started to get every informations about the Uni. Lucky me that I have a friend who had already started to study in the Uni. I contacted him immediately after I get the news that I am not going to Singapore for the informations about the intake, the courses, the school fees and stuff. And surprisingly, he gave me all the informations within an hour! Woo!

And after getting the infos, I called and tell another of my friend who worked for the Uni before. And he! Has been a VERY BIGG HELP to me! OMG! Im so Freaking touched! He came over to my place just now, and called over to the Uni and dig out everything! Woo! (Although I called the Uni myself already, But he insisted on calling it again)

After getting all the information I need about the Uni, I sms my dad..
"No more Singapore, Can I just apply for a local U for my study?"

And he called back... And surprisingly, he said Yes. :) As he was working, and he said he will be calling me back tomorrow.
Hopefully, he don't change his mind in a night.. D:

Gosh! Maybe I should buy them something? I mean the 2 friends I have there.. Kevin was the first one I mentioned, And Peter was the second one I mentioned!

And a Big thank you (Peter) for the twisting comment on my Facebook! Pretty sure its a big hit for my cousin LOL!

Not going to rant anymore craps here.. Have to bath and get ready for dinner!

Later Guys! And Girls!

Loves!!

Re-watched DreamGirls yesterday! And I am currently addicted to Beyonce's Listen! It's just... Nice XD

I know it's a 2006's song.. And it may sounds pretty outdated to some of you out there.. But who care?

Lady Gaga's Poker face was released last year? Sounds pretty old to me too.. But all the pubs are still doing the PO PO PO PO POKER FACE PO PO PO PO KER FACE.. lol

And yea, everyone enjoyed it..

Well, am here just to share the song :) Cheers! And now.. listen to Listen.

Peace!

Happy New Year!

Ahha! Im on time now this time! Blek!

Not going to make it a long one.. but a quick and short update, Just to Wish you all the best in the very new beginning of 2010.. and may aLLLL your wishes come true!

And once again.. Happy New Year!

P/S: Im going to get myself a new BELT as my new year's gift! Wee!

Go Fred! It's a brand new start! Do it well! BRAVO BRAVOOO!

Merry Belated Christmas!

Sorry for not wishing you all a Merry Chrismas on time! Hah! Been busy busy busy and BUSY!

So hereby~ I wish you all a Merry Christmas And a Happy New Year! <3>

My Chistmas Gift from Someone special and Cool!

Unwrapped!

A big big BIG thanks to the SOMEONE! Love ya! And yea.. You can have a kiss from me! LOL!

Muack!

Peace! And Happy New Year!

Something for You all to THINK...

From the Very beginning of US.. I sensed that this is never going to last long.. I just knew it..

The longest could most probably last for like.. 2MONTHS?
And yea.. I was so right at this..


*I get UPSET when YOU don't even bother to ask who I was talking to on the phone for like an hour..*

*I get really UPSET when I am always the one who asked you out for dinner.. and how many times have you asked me out for dinner? 2 out of 10?*

*I get really UPSET when there is a long pause between us, when one topic is over.. Why can't you try to put something up for us to talk about? And said that I have to learn on bringing topic out for us to talk.. cause I am too quite..?!*

*I get very UPSET at you, when you are sort of toying me.. It confused me a lot that you were so good and close to me today.. and the the next day? You are completely different... Which is totally cold to me..*

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Do you ever see me showing you anger? List me one..

How many times did I showed you my smile?

When I was in your car...

ME :"Your sort of dumping me aren't you..?"
YOU :"No! Not dumping you! It's just that.. I think it would be better for us to be friend.. Good friend!"
ME :"...."
YOU :"Are you okay?"
ME :"Yea.." *Looking outside the windshield.. Trying to avoid any eye contact with YOU*

And I step out of your car, and walk straight to my house's gate without turning my head back.. Locked the gate, threw away my wallet, walked up-stair, grabbed my towel, walked into the bathroom and try to clean myself up.

Mum:" You went to drink..?"
Me :" Yea."
Mum:" What's the matter man.. You looks like some one just stepped on your tail.."
Me :" Not in a good mood.. And that's why I drink.."
Mum:" then tell me.. what happened?"
Me :" Nothing.. I think I am just tired.."
*Walked out of the bathroom, locked my bedroom's door.. and lie on my bed.. Tried so hard to clean out my mind.. But only then I realized how hard it is to stop thinking of something and some one..*

And again.. We met for dinner... and we went back to YOUR place..
And we lie on your bed..

YOU :" Hey, are you alright? You have been so quite since dinner.."
Me :" *SMILE* Yea.. Im good.. Im okay"
YOU :" Er.. Why didn't you ask me why?"
Me :" I... Forgot.. Hehe.. *SMILE*"
YOU :" What the.. So, do you want to know about it.. I've been waiting for you to ask me why on making this decision.. but you doesn't seems like interested on knowing the reason."
Me :" Yea, sure.. Why..?"
YOU :" I didn't actually think that I would be with you or anything.. But it's hard to tell what's gonna happen next.. I've always wanted to find someone who is able to make a decision for me.. and actually care about me and stuff.. "
Me :" *Thinking* Didn't I showed how much I cared? Was that not enough? Guess it is not.. Didn't I helped you on making any possible decision that you were saying..? I guess I didn't.. Never at all.. Failed..*

YOU turned and look at me..

Me :" *SMILE* Yea?"
YOU:" You get what I meant?"
Me :" Ya.. I do.. Of course I do.. *SMILE*"
YOU:" I know you are kind of confused about me.. that Im so hot to you now.. and cold to you the next second.. Are you? Mad at me.? You must be cursing me now right? In your heart."
Me :" *SMILE* No! No..! Why would I curse you? Mad at you.? No! Seriously.. Im not*SMILE*"
YOU:" Are we good? Or do we need to stop seeing each other for some times ? To forget me or something..?"
Me :" Not necessary to do that.. I don't forget about peoples around me.. It'll always be peoples that forgot about me.."

And there is a long pause...

Me :" *Thinking* Should I really get mad about this? This is nothing..! Why should I be like over reacted about this..?"

I gave YOU my last smile and said.. " Im tired.. I need to sleep.."
And I turned my back at YOU.. And I remembered that, I tried to avoid any body contact with YOU that night.. Squeezed myself so far away from YOU.. As we are just friend.. I find that it might be a bit disrespecting YOU, If I am still treating YOU like before..
And it was the longest night ever.. I couldn't sleep at all.. And I slept when the dawn break..

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YOU told me your finger was injured when you accidentally knocked on a cupboard..
I grabbed the first AID box, and get YOU a sticking plaster.. But YOU didn't take it from me.. Instead YOU were showing me YOUR injured finger, and insisted on wanting me on helping YOU to put on the plaster.

And so I did.. And you kissed.

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YOU cut YOUR finger when we were cooking at YOUR place.. I ran and grabbed YOU a sticking plaster.. And asked YOU to use it.. YOU said no.. But I insist on wanting YOU to use it..
And YOU listened.
And I SMILED.

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I used to text YOU around 4.30PM for dinner... And I felt really down when I get replies like this from YOU..
"Cant, dinner with clients tonight.. Might be late" *Forgot on asking me how about my meal?*
"Cant, have to entertain client.. Might be home late"

"Sorry, Can't make it tonight.. have to drink with the boss here.."
"Can't make it tonight.. Dinner with colleagues."
"Sorry there, I have to dine with my customers tonight.. Have your dinner with your mom? Don't wait for me.. Might be late.." *Finally..?*

And I used to reply YOU...
"Oh.. Alright.. It's okay.. "

"No problem man.. I'll take something later when Im hungry.."

"Ow.. Okay.. Enjoy your meal then =) "

And I know YOU have plenty of "happy hour" with YOUR bosses and YOUR client.. Which you need to drink tons of beer or maybe some other alcoholic drinks.
And whenever I tried to tell YOU that..
"Hey, easy there.. Don't drink too much alright.. It's not good for your health.."

And how many times will YOU reply me something which is good to hear? I'll always remember what you text-ed me last time..
"You'll find it hard to reject when you are grown up and started working.. Easier said than done."

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Am I not showing how much I cared? Or does that sounds like I am some kind of busy body? Well, I am sorry if I had behaved like that..
How much DO I need to show.. so that YOU know that I actually cared..? Was that not enough? I guess it was never enough for YOU... Sorry about that.. My bad..
I was never good on being someone who expected me to be...

Whenever YOU asked what to eat, where to dine, which movie to watch, what to do..
"My answer will always be.. Im okay with anything.. You decide, I'll follow."
Does that means that I have nothing in my mind on making a decision? I would say that It is not..
I don't want everything to go by MY WAY.. I am not a selfish person.. I respect YOUR choices..
Did I ever make noises or complain about whatever choices or decision that YOU've made?
I believe that I had never complain nor said anything about any choices YOU made..

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And now, every friends around me.. seems to be asking the same question when they see me alone standing in front of them..
"Hey.. wheres XXX?"
And I would say.. " I don't know.. "
And they would ask.. " What? You don't know? You should know where XXX is ..?"
And I would reply.. " Why should I know where XXX is..?

And one of my friend helped me to answered.. " You all can stop asking him where XXX is already..! He has nothing to do with XXX.. DUH.."

And what else I can say..? Other than..

"Yea.. he is right.. I had nothing to do with XXX.. So I don't really have to know where XXX is, what XXX is doing.. and whatever that has to do with XXX.. *SMILE* "

And this is when I am starting to lose the warmth of your palm..

But we are still friend right..? Aren't we..?

This group.. of US..

Firstly.. I would like to tell you guys what.. I don't have any photo for who and what I am going to tell later.. Sorry about it..
*Cause I didn't brought along my camera all the time, like the time I do in Singapore*

Alright.. You know.. When I just got back from Singapore.. And I was like.. Hmm.. Finally Im back here.. Should start to get all my buddies out and have a huge long chat with them.. ( When they are free of course )
But then, I realized that, 1 of my closest buddy went over to Taiwan for his study.. another one went to New Zealand ( But I think he is coming back real soon! =X ) And bla bla..
Just most of them went oversea.. And now those friends who I am closed with left not more than 5 in Sibu here.. How sad..

Well, actually I do have lots of friends here in Sibu, the problem is that, I don't feel like asking them out or to meet them or to whatever.. Cause, they are the kind of people which is kind of hard to get interact with.. And THEY.. DO.. DRUGS! And smoke.. Argh!

Until~ I met some new friends here~ And they are really niceee! And sweet!

I don't really talk much to them at the very beginning of our friendship. As times passes... I get to know them more.. opened up more to them.. Which is goooddd~ XD As we have more topics to gossip about. hehe!

I never thought that they will be the one whos there to comfort me when Im feeling so freaking down.. And I am really surprised that they actually knew that Im feeling moody and down..
Cause usually when Im down and sad about something.. I don't usually show it.. As I don't want other to be annoyed by my problems..

Im really surprised that they were actually siding me and willing to even spend their times on talking to me and cheer me up.. That felt so freaking SWEET!
*Wanna know who they are? I'll reveal who they are after I get their photos"

And we had midnight supper yesterday, after they are done with their bussiness. And as usual, we talked about something pretty interesting.. And we're laughing like mad while we're eating!! They told me lots of things which the other guys said.. and BLAA BLLAA.. Gossiping and gossipingggg!
*I don't think its a good idea to tell everything out here.. as it might freak the crap out of some of you, maybe.. *


Alright man! Im going out for my meal now.. I'll try to get their photos as soon as I could.. and I show it to you guys~ My buddiesssszz~! xD Love them!
And sorry for a random post like this... Haha!